The Covid Chronicles

For my first blog post, I want to introduce to you my compilation of funny and positive stories from my days in the life of living through a Covid world. Please enjoy, laugh and/or cry with me.

3/11/2020 ~ Give up wine for Lent, they said.
You can do it, they said.
It’s only 40 days, they said.

“They” are the voices inside my head and “they” are so fired.

3/13/2020 ~ I forget… is it considered good luck or bad luck when your dog pees on you like you were a fire hydrant on Friday the 13?

3/16/2020 ~ Day 1 of being George’s first grade teacher… I had to google the difference between a long and short “o” sound.

3/19/2020 ~ It’s been a long… almost week. We’ve had fun with play doh, puzzles, paint, markers, trail walks, riding vehicles and bikes but also a lot of tears, yelling and timeouts. My daughter even asked me if she could go back to school to tomorrow… but also just now she said “you are a great mommy”

One day she will out grow me. One day she will think she doesn’t need me. One day she will think I can’t relate to her. One day I will lose her but that day is not today. As hard as all of this is, I have to be grateful for the extra time I have been given with my kids who actually still do want me around.

3/23/2020 ~ So… liquor stores are considered essential right? I can’t be the only one wondering this 😳

3/24/2020 ~ Putting your 7 year old in charge of your 4 year old so you can take a shower.

3/25/2020 ~ For the love of Pete, can someone else just figure out what to make for our next meal 🤪😫

3/26/2020 ~ It’s both amazing and disgusting the amount of dirt and dog hair I am getting out of the vacuum these days.

3/27/2020 ~ What’s worse then putting LEGOs together? Putting fake LEGOs together 😩🤦‍♀️ #fegos

3-27-2020 ~ Quarantine drinking game… every time you hear “Mom!” Take a drink. Just kidding, don’t do that, you will die.

3-31-2020 ~ That’s it, all my students are expelled until further notice 🤪 #serenitynow

4-4-2020 ~ I don’t know whether to feel proud or sad 🙃

4-9-2020 ~ Trying to do a google meets eLearning session with your ADD 1st grader is a lot like picking crabs when your hands are covered in open paper cuts…. PAINFUL 😣 Anyone else walking around their houses completely talking to themselves, just to hear another adult, live voice? Asking for a friend.

4-15-2020 ~ Why do my kids have to be the clean kids, the ones that want to baths and showers everyday… I mean who is even doing that nowadays?

4-19-2020 ~ I was going to write about our #socialdistancing adventure for today… but this video sums it up perfectly #overit #sooverit 🤦‍♀️

4-20-2020 ~ Stumbled onto a camp sight during our #socialdistancing adventure today. Yes there were people inside and yes my children walked right up to it and said “wakie! Wakie!” 🤦‍♀️ #ineedtowriteabook

4-27-2020 ~ George just asked me how to spell “RC Car” Wow… his new teacher really sucks 🤦‍♀️😳 #homeschooling

Just a little about my day so far. Fifteen minutes before my first zoom meeting with the entire department since we were quarantined and Patrick paints his entire mouth with red paint, and the wall. No idea when he did that blue marker wall drawing. During the meeting he paints his sister’s favorite doll. Later in the day I catch George holding down Meredith and Patrick hovering over her hair with a pair of scissors, one more second and he would have had a chunk of it in his hands. I’m no longer losing control, I’ve official lost it 🙈 #quarantinedwithkids

4-29-2020 ~ I can’t decide if I am looking forward to seeing my “this day in Facebook history” memories next year or if I am dreading them 🤷🏻‍♀️

4-30-2020 ~ AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Just needed to let that out. Carry on.
#quarantinedwithkids

5-2-2020 ~ Pool day in quarantine, and they think I did this for them. #quarantinedwithkids #coolmom #igotthis #beautifulday

5-4-2020 ~ I just wanted to say how sorry I am to the nice, well behaved family of 5 who only came to kayak where my 3 hooligans, dog and I were adventuring today.
1- My children do not understand personal space nor do they have a filter for their many, many questions.
2- My dog really just thought your car was his. Same size, same color, it was an honest mistake. I am sooo sorry he jumped into your car, jumped and shook his muddy and wet self all over the inside of your very clean car.
#mylife #comeonman #quarantinedwithkids #allapologies

5-5-2020 ~ Have I taken this too far? Asking for a friend.

5-8-2020 ~ First shower since Monday. #quarantinelife

5-9-2020 ~ Does anyone know where you can get a good Bloody Mary to go? I want it already made, not a kit I have to mix together myself.
#askingforafriend #mustincludeolives 

5-12-2020 ~ When I start my day I really do try to put myself into the best frame of mind to take the kids on a social distant adventure. Even when I have to tell them over and over to get dressed, put on their shoes and socks, stop letting the dog out, get a sweatshirt… why aren’t you wearing underwear, no you can’t wear your Sky custom on a hike, get in the car, why aren’t you in the car, no we are not taking iPads… “I want my window down… all the way” “I’m cold!!! Put it up, put it up” “No the wind is good” “I want my ipad!” Are we there yet”

Needless to say by the time we have reached our final destination, my frame of mind has shifted slightly. Now getting everyone and the dog, and the wagon, and the bike out of the car without getting hit by a car because most people are as fed up as me and need to get out of their houses. “Stop!” “No wait” “Because I said so” “No… get off that porch, we don’t know who lives there” “Please stop running with the dog’s buoy while I have him on the leash unless you want a one armed mommy”

And finally we make it to the trail. Meredith could be in Pennsylvania for all I know she’s taken off like a bat out of Hell on her bike. Patrick walks five steps and is already soooo tired and wants to go back to the car. Later on the down the road I have the dog off the leash and all the sudden he disappears. I’m calling and calling, this dog is my shadow he always comes when I call. Finally I hear “bahhhh bahhh bahhh” just as a group of nice older women are walking towards us all wearing masks, Meredith is several yards ahead of us and the dog is chasing goats and sheep (hence the “bah bah bahhh” I was hearing) inside a wood fence lined with live electric wires.

I mean come on dog. He has already jumped in and over the fence twice by the time I get to him, he looks at me like… “I’m not jumping that again”. So I have to climb, lean over fence and drag him up and over all while he whimpers from the shocks. “You were the one who jumped over, TWICE!”

Put dog back on leash, find kids entertaining the nice group of women on the trail. Yeah pretty sure I left them with a great impression of parenting 🤦‍♀️. A full mile and a half, if not more from where we parked, we finally find the clearing I’ve been wanting to take them too only there is a nice couple with their dog and sweet toddler enjoying the same side of river we have now invaded. The sight of all three of my hooligans and crazy brown down barreling down the hill, is more than enough to send them packing.

George finds a dam and starts climbing over all the trees, twins follow. Nothing can go wrong here 🤪 Meredith almost immediately falls into a muddy sink hole up to her knee “I’m cold! I’m so cold. But I’m fine” She manages to last a little longer or at least long enough for the dog to lose his 2nd buoy down the river and the kids to roll someone’s obvious sitting stoop into the water. Guess who gets to run in after it before it is also lost down the river 🙋🏻‍♀️ Good times now I’m ready to go back.

For the mile and half way back I have the dog’s leash hooked up to the wagon pulling Patrick and George, with me holding onto the leash in the middle and dragging Meredith along on her bike. When I reached a sign saying 1 mile to Monkton, I want to cry. We parked at Monkton. By the time we get back into the car, even the dog looks at me like “you know, you can really leave me home next time.”

And since that part of my day went so well why not build a fire in the fire pit and make smores because I am so good at building fires in the fire pit. I am not, not at all. It was mostly smoke and when there was fire, Patrick and George poked it with their sticks until they were lit and chased each other around the pit with them.

If you made it this far you are probably as tired as I am. Have a good night!

#quarantinedwithkids #AdventuresInSocialDistancing #goodparenting #momoftheyear #overit

5-13-2020 ~

5-17-2020 ~ Today my kids got to play on a playground for the first time in almost three months. They were so happy I thought I was going to cry.

5-31-2020 ~ In case you were wondering what was going on in our house today

6-7-2020 ~ Some days I amaze myself. Other days I look for my phone while talking on it.

6-20-2020 ~ We waited very patiently for the scuba diver who insisted he had to have wetsuit on to fix a drain even though it took him longer to put the suit on than it did to fix the drain… but anyway it was worth the wait!!! The pool is finally OPEN!

6-23-2020 ~ I’ve reached the point where if my child is screaming bloody murder, I don’t even flinch. So here’s to hoping nothing actually serious ever happens to them 🤞

6-23-2020 ~ So… how many of your kids are going to have a whole lot of new vocabulary words when they go back to school? Asking for a friend.

7-2-2020 ~ Fine dinning Covid Style… honestly though this food and service was amazing. I hope they make are still here when we come back ❤️❤️❤️

7-12-2020 ~ Took the kids to lunch the other day in Ocean City, afraid to say where but, so far, it has not made the closed due to COVID-19 list. I will say they were extremely cautious and vigilant in their social distancing rules. It wasn’t busy, we didn’t have to wait for a table, no one sat next to or across from us, we were outside on the water and the kids could still play in the sand.

We got to talking to our waiter Ben, a college student currently living out of his car just to have a job and learn life experiences. At the end of our meal, he gave my husband his phone number and said he was really interested in construction… even though my husband never mentioned he was a contractor, used his personal not business credit card and we arrived by duck boat not his giant, white ford truck that screams contractor. We started talking more and he mentioned having worked at a restaurant where Steve Bisciotti docks his boat and how down to earth and genuinely nice he was. Another thing we could all agreed on.

Long story short… Here is this kid working where there is an opportunity to work. Doing everything he can to better himself and make connections in the mist of all this chaos for lack of a better word. These kinds of random connections are hard to make over a phone call, resume, email, zoom… etc.

I don’t know that we will necessarily be able to do anything for him but I guarantee my husband will remember him if he does need help with something and I also guarantee, with his attitude and ambition, he will probably already be busy with another opportunity.

Remember there are no small jobs. Just small people ~Gulliver’s Travels

7-22-2020 ~ Downloaded Grand Left Auto on my 7 and 4 year olds’ iPads today. Can’t decide if I am the coolest or worst mom ever 🙈🤷🏻‍♀️🤦‍♀️

7-26-2020 ~ Remember when we were worried about deer ticks, Lyme disease, bird flu, swine flu, SARS, Zika, lice, hand foot and mouth, stomach flu… those were the good old days 🤦‍♀️

7-27-2020 ~ Kids went to camp today. Fastest 7 hours of my life since my first day back to work after the twins were born… nope, definitely faster 🤪

7-31-2020 ~ Most days I look at her and think she is too pretty to have come from me but then she opens her mouth and affirms she’s all me.

8-4-2020 ~ Is a burning, rash like, bee stinging sensation going from armpit to elbow a symptom of Covid or have I officially become allergic to my kids?

8-20-2020 ~ Anyone else walk in and out and around a room before they finally remember what it is they went in there for in the first place… and then still forget it? Asking for me… it’s me… I do it all the time.

9-8-2020 ~ First day of virtual school is going great. I put my phone in the washing machine. Didn’t realize until the spin cycle. It’s clean, not sure if it’s going to survive but it’s clean! 😫

9-23-2020 ~ After 10 minutes of asynchronous phonics… but I am home 😫😒 #virtuallearningweek3